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Monday, January 5, 2015

"After the fire, a still small voice"

Well, this week was a little rough. Martin's baptism fell apart, two of our most promising investigators told us that they didn't want to meet anymore, and our efforts to work more with the ward have been fruitless. With regards to Martin, Enoch, and Victor, we are incredibly sad, but we are taking this as motivation to really clean out and rebuild our teaching pool. With the ward, my frustration comes from this pressing sense of urgency to find people, to teach, and to help them on their path to Christ in any way that I can. This feeling isn't exactly shared by the leadership and members in Bremen. And for me, I'm having a hard time accepting the fact that people have their agency in how they prioritize and act and balancing that with my burning sense of responsibility and duty. It makes me feel impatient and flustered - I don't quite feel like myself.

I was able to find some comfort in my personal study this morning. I studied the story of Elijah in 1 Kings 18 and 19. I learned that the Lord has the ability to make incredible miracles happen, but that that doesn't necessarily promise smooth sailing from that point on. Elijah had done nothing wrong - he was obedient, bold, and faithful. But Ahab and Jezebel were chasing him with an entire army, swearing to kill him. Elijah was exhausted. He was frustrated. He felt alone and confused. Then the Lord came to him and showed him huge winds, an earthquake, and a massive fire. But the scriptures say that the Lord was not in these mighty manifestations of power. Verse 12 says: "And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice." That is where the Lord is - in the small, quiet moments. He is always there. I am determined to follow the counsel of Elder Holland to "Hope on. Journey on." I am fixed in my purpose. I will move forward in faith. I love being a missionary and I am grateful for every day spent here in Germany.

I invite all of you to read those chapters in 1 Kings. Not only did I find a lot of comfort in these verses, but Elijah's sass with the priests of Baal is pretty entertaining. 

Liebe Grüße, 

Sister Hendricks

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